One Size Does Not Fit All. The Problem with Parenting Books.
As a child psychologist, I am often asked for book references about parenting. However, I seldom suggest parenting books for the families I work with. Although, it sounds silly not to have a reference guide, I can honestly say I have yet to find a book that represents my practices. Now don't get me wrong, I have recommended books, especially for children with severe anxiety or depression, but when it comes to finding a book as a tool or reference about parenting skills, I no longer recommend books.
As a parent myself, I've read books on parenting, including books on nursing, sleep training, handling tantrums, etc. I found myself feeling engaged while waiting on pins and needles to find out the answers. However, once my questions were answered I felt disappointed; as if there was only one right answer. I could hear the writers voice. His opinion was strong, clear, and guiding, but I questioned the generalizability of the suggestions.
Reading parenting books caused me to debate the details. I think of the different families I work with, the diverse cultures, religious preferences, lifestyles that may not work with one book's recommendations. In other words, one size does not fit all. Finding the right parenting book for the complexities of parents, children, and each family's culture was lacking.
My solution thus far has been to create tools, handouts, activities, role plays, and more to address each topic. By doing so I've found that I have the flexibility to address different issues with a diverse range of tools. Additionally, I've started creating handouts with specific instructions for each family. Lastly, I've started a business Pinterest page with ideas and print outs for families in need. These quick guides can help any family and are easier than taking the tome to read a book that you end up feeling is unrelatable.
Now, I am hopeful that I could find a book that I truly like and agree with, but at this point, I have not. Who knows, maybe I'll end up writing my own book...
In the meantime, take a look at my Pinterest page nd tell me what you think! Also, let me know what tools, tips, or tricks you would like for you and your children in the future!
https://www.pinterest.com/mmmontalvo/